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Projections of the Past

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Published: 11Dec2009
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As yet another milestone nears the mind projects forward possible scenarios with a phantasmagoric range of outcomes. All of these projections are based upon the past. I find myself spending alarming amounts of time, clearing my reflections of a past filled with mistakes. Having stepped in so many of the spiritual cow patties which line the straight and narrow path towards spiritual growth, much like land mines in a modern day battlefield, I find myself projecting new dangers in anticipation. The actions of those around me serve as mirrors, and it's easy to get confused as to what behaviors are in the past, and what are still present.

There is a lesson in A Course in Miracles which reads something like; "My mind is preoccupied with thoughts of the past." In actuality there is a whole section with the concept that all of which we see is a projection. We could say that what we think of ourselves is a collection of our thoughts, memories, emotions, associations and projections. If we were to let go of all of these we would be in a state of oneness with all creation; or as Nisargadatta Maharaj might say; the "I am" state.

More and more I see my past reflected in someone else's actions. The thought; "there, but for the grace of time, go I", flashes across my consciousness. I know the original saying is "the grace of God", but if it were not for my intention to change that which I can; God's grace would not have had a window to step through.

Colored by memories of my and the collective's past, thoughts arise out of the formless potential of pure consciousness, unbidden, and usually unrelated to any conscious process. I see a highway patrol car and memories of past associations flash by which the ego is eager to assign meaning to. In reality it's only meaning is its existence; likewise for everything else which invades my awareness. It's a constant barrage of meaningless memories which the ego is only happy to scan; looking for something to attach to, like a lamprey eel seeking its next host.

It's not until I drop down below the chatter of thought that I find refuge from the incessant traffic. Then, the endless stream is like looking up at the surface of the water during a rainstorm from a vantage point ten or more feet down. You can see the pattern that the rain makes, but you are unaffected by the impact of those drops striking whatever surface they happen to fall on. The opportunity for the mind to assign meaning to the occurrence is there, but one has the choice to pay attention to it or not. The ego would love to get caught up in it of course, but you can simply be the observer, watching the pattern that arises and changes with the nature of the rain.

Somewhere in my collection of slides from my early years as a photographer, is an image of a group of construction workers in a NY City, second floor window lined up with tiered chairs, chasing down lunch with a viewing of the day's parade along 5th Avenue. The hustle and bustle goes by and they can observe it unaffected by the buffeting of the crowd, the smells and sounds that assault the senses during lunch hour in midtown Manhattan. They are insulated from its pull, except when some unusual character or a particularly attractive beauty walks by. Then the ego gets its opportunity to grab a little energy fueled by projections of their thoughts, memories, associations and perceptions. The fantasies that fill their heads are not in any way shaped by reality; but a composite of their youthful experiences, the movies they have watched and whatever erotic stimuli they have encountered.

Being aware of this play gives me an opportunity to say "no" to the ego's relentless quest for energy and the mind's endless prattle of thoughts. When I open to The Field, whether it's in a time of meditation, or more frequently contemplation, I can simply observe it all; like watching clouds float by. They have no meaning, except for what they are.

David Lowell has been working with energy and healing for 30 years. His clients and students include people from all walks of life on 5 continents. He is the author of "The Struggle to Surrender: Love, Consciousness & The Quantum Field" and publishes "Perspectives" an irregular free Ezine. To see more articles by David and find out about his work go to => http://davidlowell.com/

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