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8 Tips to Manage Your Anger

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Published: 31Jul2005
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Experiencing uncontrolled anger is dangerous to your health. It causes your adrenaline and blood pressure to rise up at above normal levels. Moreover, you could end up hurting someone or doing something that you will regret later on. You see the results destructive anger every day on the news.

Also, uncontrolled anger destroys relationships. I use the word uncontrolled deliberately. Everyone gets angry, but what we do with our anger is the heart of the issue.

Here are 8 tips to help you be the one in control of yourself, and not anger.

1) Learn to relax.

Calm yourself down. Take a deep breath. As you exhale, imagine all those bottled-up fury come out of your nose and mouth. Release it and be free. Repeat this step over and over until you feel peace inside.

Then visualize being in a place where you feel most happy, calm, and relaxed. It may be a place like a beach, garden, scenic locations, or anywhere else you might think of. Just imagine being there and inhaling the essence of your serene environment. By doing this, you will not find it hard to attain inner peace.

2) Pour out your anger to safe outlets.

You had a big quarrel with your former friend. He betrayed your trust. You want vengeance and you're raving mad.

Hold it. Restrain yourself.

Try your best to get away from him as far as you can. You don't want to hurt anyone. Anger can possess your brain into doing something that you wouldn't dare do before.

How do you then release your anger if you can't restrict it anymore?

Buy a punching bag, and then pour out all your rage in it. Punch it, not out of control punches, but deliberate controlled punches. Don’t imagine the punching bag as your enemy. But, you do want to release stress. When you're done, you will feel a sense of satisfaction. You may even punch and kick through thin air if you desire.

Another way to release it is "SHOUT!" Find a distant place where you can be alone - a place where no one can hear you. At the top of your voice, yell out loud "Aaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrgggggghhhhhhh."

3) Forgive and forget.

Nothing could ease your mental and emotional pains better than by forgiving someone that has hurt you in the past. It is very unhealthy to burden yourself with unnecessary torture brought about by unpleasant memories of other people's demeaning acts.

Moreover, if they have taken something important away from you, would it make sense to also sacrifice your health and lifestyle? Of course not.

4) Exercise.

Engaging in exercises increases your endorphins. Your angry mood could miraculously change to a happy one if you get involved in exercises that you enjoy doing. Exercise gives you an opportunity to think things through, as well. Walking, especially, will give you an opportunity to think and perhaps put things in a better frame work.

5) Have a circle of friends to share your hurts.

Do you feel relieved when you voice out all your problems to close friends and relatives? That's the power of voicing out your inner feelings.

Always have someone to talk to when you're down, when you're depressed, when you're mad, or in any other occasion when you feel you have to get the hurt out of your chest.

6) Listen to soothing music.

It calms your soul. A 20 minute session of listening to relaxing music while resting comfortably could soothe the upset spirit. Take deep breaths often. Make sure it is relaxing music. There are some choices of music that will cause you to be angry all over again.

7) Pray.

Deadly consequences arise when people could not hold back their fury. Ask for guidance that you will be able to control your temper. Prayers bring inner peace to those who ask for it.

8) Stay away from angry people.

The ancient writers warn not to hang around angry people because it would cause you to become angry. I had a close friend that was always exploding about everything. Therefore, I broke off our friendship so that I would not catch the angry spirit. I lost a friendship, but protected myself from a destructive spirit.

Dr. John Neyman has been teaching every week for the last 21 years. He is the Founder of www.relationshipexcel.com Dr. John writes weekly for his local newspaper and weekly tips for healthy relationships. Email him at: john@leaderssuccess.com Or if you have a particular question you can ask it at: http://www.askdoctorjohn.com

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