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Three Times You Should Absolutely Be Yourself

By Julia Austin

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Published: 20Jan2012
Word count: 526
Viewed: 139 time(s)

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We can't bring all of our personality everywhere we go. Our particular sense of humor doesn't always belong at our job, our political views don't belong at every dinner party we go to and our gaudy outfits don't belong at every function we attend. But, that being said, there are a few areas of life in which you should make a whole-hearted attempt to be completely yourself. Like these:

In a relationship:
Don't pretend you're into an activity just because your partner is. Don't pretend something they do doesn't bother you that actually drives you up the wall. Don't pretend that you need or want less than you need or want. You will never be able to condition yourself to want less, or to be someone else. So, if you're going to pretend to be someone you're not in a relationship, that is a battle you will be fighting your entire life and it will only get more difficult. The one place that is supposed to be completely welcoming and comfortable in your life—your relationship—will become just like your work, or the home of that crazy step mom you can't stand. It will be a place where you have to suck up your feelings, and be aware of every little move you make, instead of a loving place where you can let it all loose.

In your writing/singing/performing:
Never try to imitate someone else's artistic work. As a rule, I actually read as little as possible of material that is in the same genre of my own. Why? Because I don't want someone else's style accidentally infiltrating my work! I don't want to unconsciously begin writing like someone else. I also don't want to consciously compare myself to someone else because, once one starts doing that, they forget the very particular and special traits that their own work brings. They forget that it's not about being better or worse, but different. A video on Per Bristow's The Singing Zone discusses this point very thoroughly and I recommend any performer to watch it.

In large business deals:
When you are the employee, of course you have to put on a certain image. You have to dress and speak a certain way, and even pretend that certain things are your priorities, that simply are not. But, when you are doing big business, like considering taking a partner on in your firm, or selling half of your company, lay everything out on the table. Let the person who could be representing all of your hard work know exactly what you stand for. Let them know if you swear sometimes, or if you like to take three-martini lunches, or if you absolutely can't stand people with a certain political opinion. You are essentially entering into a relationship with this person, and you don't want that interpersonal relationship to affect the quality of the work you do together.

Julia Austin is a dating columnist who also covers luxury lifestyle and healthy living topics for various publications. Her subject matter ranges from eco-friendly hotels to first date tips and even methods on how to improve one's singing and voice techniques.

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