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How Do I Know That I Have an Inner Critic - I Thought It Was Just Me

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Published: 14Jul2009
Word count: 660
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"Whatever we plant in our subconscious mind and nourish with repetition and emotion will one day become a reality." Earl Nightingale

Many people struggle with reaching peak potential. The committee, the negative and critical messages you tell yourself, has been one of the reasons for sabotage. Slowly losing momentum and returning to old behaviors. The committee returns because success might be contradictory to your core beliefs. You might actually have a deep seated belief about not being successful and not even realize it is there. My choice is to always turn a negative into a positive. Even a relapse back to old behaviors can be positive when approached as a learning opportunity. It does not mean that I condone sabotage, but recognize it as a tool to help reframe for success.

The negative messages that you tell yourself are typically ones that you received from someone else. Originally, they were not your messages or beliefs. Hearing messages repeatedly will eventually become internalized as your own.

Which are your messages? "I'm not good enough." "I can't do that." "I haven't worked hard enough to deserve that." What has your inner critic been telling you? Think of the opportunities when a part of you wanted to do something. Once you began to think about that choice the reasons not to take action started to take over. Did you become stuck? You might have felt that you were being pulled in two different directions. Finally, you made a choice. Did you take action or choose not to? The thought of taking action was in direct conflict with your beliefs of who you are and what you ought to be doing.

Children receive messages from many sources about what is okay to do and what to avoid. Although the underlying reason for the message is to help you be a better person in society, children just focus on the content of the words. What they hear is the "I can't...", 'I shouldn't..." and "don't do that because..." As children, adults are the authority figures. They are the guides in our development of learning "right" from "wrong." When your guides come from a negative place, then the messages that you internalize will be negative and critical.

The inner critic contributes to missed opportunities and remaining stuck. Instead of having a "can do" attitude, there is a "can't do" belief. Even when you begin to make positive change, there might be some discomfort with that since it does not complement your inner belief. That eventually leads to sabotage and staying in a safe place.

People respond better to positive rather than negative messages. Think about the messages you hear in your mind. The negative, critical voice might be having an ongoing conversation with you. Since that voice is constantly there, you might not even realize how many times you are criticizing yourself. Take a moment to listen. What would be a positive way of restating those messages? How would you feel and be different if you did not have that constant, critical dialogue with your inner critic? Are you ready to make a change from negative to positive?

It is possible to transform negative self talk. How attractive is it when someone is constantly being critical of themselves or others. Do you want to release the negative thoughts and messages that you hear? Change is possible.

Realizing that the inner critic is separate from you is the first step toward positive change. Once you have made this distinction, begin transforming from negative self talk to positive affirmations. You are in a position where you have choice to continue with that message or to create one that is better suited for who you are today. Recognize that you have the choice to reframe your beliefs from negative to positive. Acknowledge that the inner critic guided you. Release the negative message that someone else told you. Begin to imagine what you would like your positive affirmation to be.

Ready to move forward in your life, but feel stuck? Learn how to transform the thoughts that keep you from taking action. Loren Fogelman, the success expert, shows you how to master the marketing mindset to grow your business. Get Loren's FREE E-book, "Tapping Into Emotional Freedom"

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