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Don't Let Your Blues Defeat You: 3 Tips To Win The Fight

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Published: 30Jun2010
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I'm not saying that stress and depression are figments of your imagination. Anyone who has ever felt alone or hopeless would be able to assure you that the feelings are real. It is just that coping with these feelings can be harder because of the things that go on in your mind.

We used to have a next door neighbor who lived in her big house by herself. She didn't drive, and she never went anywhere. I don't know how she got her groceries or did anything she had to do with the outside world. I saw her in her back yard occasionally, but other than those rare sightings, she spent most of her life in her living room.

She wasn't a bad person. When my siblings or I had something to sell for school, she would make her contribution. She showed me plants in her yard because they were very interesting. But, the life she lived in her head was much more exciting and dangerous than anyone in our small town could conjure from reality.

"Those Stanton boys make cat calls at me whenever they see me on my porch," she would tell my mother when they happened to be outside at the same time.

"those Robertsons fight with each other every night. I've often been tempted to call the police," she might confide at another time.

The Stanton boys were in their 30s at the time, and hadn't lived in our neighborhood for years. The Robertsons lived as close to us as they did to her, but we never heard them. To our neighbor, however, the things she complained about were as real as the blue sky above was to the rest of us.

Fortunately, most of us don't get paranoid when we're blue. However, prolonged states of sadness can make the world seem a lot more hostile than it is. This is why it is so important to learn how to deal with occasional bouts of depression effectively before they develop into long term mental health issues. Here are some suggestions that might help:

1. Don't stay alone. Join church groups, clubs or civic groups so that you are in contact with other humans. It may be awhile before strong enough bonds are created to become satisfying friendships, but getting out of the house will lend you perspective on the world, and give you a chance to see your life in a new, and hopefully brighter light. If you give yourself and the other people you meet a chance, you will find that relationships develop, and that eventually you will have friends to keep your thoughts warm and happy.

2. Consider getting a pet. Your dog or cat won't talk about Shakespeare with you, but he / she will be content to sit with you and keep you company on an otherwise lonely night. Animals are not two faced about their affections. They appreciate food and attention, and will reciprocate your love with a warm enthusiasm that is bound to chase your blues away. Besides, an animal isn't going to fight you for the remote control. He / she might chew it up, but if you keep it out of his / her reach, there won't be any arguments about what to watch on TV.

3. Learn something new. Take a class or read a book about something that peaks your curiosity. Get on the Internet and search for information that you've always wanted to have. Go to your public library and see if someone in your town is offering classes in something that interests you. If you give your mind something else to chew on, it won't be as likely to turn itself to the things that make you sad or lonely.

If you are depressed for a long time, you should consult a health professional. Even if you can identify the reasons for your sadness, a person trained in mental health can help you cope with the feelings that are interfering with your peace of mind. Depression is nothing to be ashamed of, any more than diabetes or cancer are reasons for embarrassment. What is important is that you get the boost you need so that your life can be a pleasure rather than the burden it can feel like at times.

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