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Transform Your Habits When You Know that Setbacks are Normal

By Marilyn Gordon

Republish: EasyPublish™ Published: 14Jan2010 Word count: 446 Viewed: 194 time(s) Get Free Content For Your Site

So many people get discouraged when they pick up a cigarette again after stopping, or they eat a Hostess Twinkie when they've committed themselves to spinach and apples, or they take another sip of that drink they'd said goodbye to. And so many people are hard on themselves and call it a failure. "There I go again," they say. "I'll never make it." But what if this is normal and really okay? Read on to find out why and how you can use it to your advantage.

Sometimes a Setback is a Message

Sometimes it's a message that you have something more to learn from the food or substance and the habit. If, instead of castigating yourself for what you perceive as failure, you instead say, "What is it I have to learn from this?" You might find that there's a particular thought or feeling that's a trigger for you. Perhaps there's something in your life that's a stress-producer, so you take another bit of the old substance because you're intending to alleviate the stress. Instead of feeling like a failure, take a look at what's stressing you. Take a deep breath in, as breathing is an amazing healing tool. It changes the chemistry of your stress. Then ask yourself if you can let go of this problem. Keep asking yourself this question, and see if it's possible to go to another level of yourself where the solution to the problem appears as if by magic - or the problem dissolves as you breathe.

Instead of Feeling Like a Failure, Consider Divine Timing

You may or may not believe in this, but it's a long-held understanding by many people. It's the sense that everything is on a divine schedule, and the perfect time makes itself known to you. You may feel it strongly inside, perhaps in your "gut." That may be the moment you can say to yourself, "I've had it, and I know I'll never do that again." Up until that time, all attempts are rehearsals to get you there. They have their own importance, and they are certainly not failures.

All Previous Attempts are Steps Along the Way

There are no wasted moments, no failures - just steps in the passage of life transformation. Some of those steps feel like you've won the Academy Award. Other steps feel like you've tumbled to the ground. But all of these are valuable. A reporter asked Thomas Edison how it felt to fail1,000 times, as Edison had made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. Edison said to the reporter, "I didn't fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps." Let that be the same for you.

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