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Is Depression Destroying Your Satisfying Senior Sex?

By Pat Wiklund

Republish: EasyPublish™ Published: 30Aug2009 Word count: 506 Viewed: 557 time(s) Get Free Content For Your Site

One of the most common causes of low sexual drive among seniors, for both men and women, is having trouble with your relationship with yourself. Especially if you are depressed, or feeling down on yourself.

Your depression may be a reaction to grieving about missed or lost opportunities, experiences, or loved ones. While grief and regrets about these misses or losses are understandable, many people hold on to them so tight, for so long, they slip from grief, regret, and frustration into depression.

Once depression grabs hold, it is almost impossible to "pull yourself together" and just get over it. In fact, just trying to tough it out and pretend you aren't depressed is one sure way to continue being depressed, and feeling even worse. Ignoring depression, or pretending things are "just fine" is an understandable, but unproductive response. Plus, the longer you ignore feeling bad, the harder its to start feeling like yourself again.

Start to turn around your depression and your low sexual drive by understanding the connection between the two:

Being depressed decreases your libido (sexual desire) Older women no longer have the hormones that promote sexual desire

Depression is increasingly common in men today

Depression meds often make both lack of desire more profound for women, and make both lack of desire and situational ED worse for men

Most men with ED have at least a low level of depression

Depression is common in older women who do not take supplemental hormones

The biggest difficulty with depression is, it won't go away by itself. No matter how much you hope it will, how long you wait, or especially, how long you ignore or deny that you're really feeling depressed.

Educate yourself and get some help if it continues to linger than a month or so.

Learn more about depression by reading, especially "Feeling Good, The New Mood Therapy" by David Burns. It's available on line and in many libraries. Burns focuses on simple, easy to take steps that can help you act your way into feeling better. Well substantiated research has shown his approach to the treatment of depression is one of the most effective depression treatment protocols available.

Just be careful not to discount the efficacy of what Burns is suggesting. It seems too simple to make a difference. And, if you are really depressed, it's hard to imagine just reading something will make a difference.

But, give it a try. A lot of your resistance is just your depression working at keeping you down. Depression can be persistent and overwhelming, but it doesn't have to run your life.

The bottom line: everyone gets something. You do, and so do I. However, it's not just what's happening but how you feel about what's happening that determines how you will live your life.

For most things, we can't go back and change it. But, we can change how we think and feel, and figure out what to do in the future to make sure we don't get into the same situation again.

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