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Why Doesn't Your Child Want to Play Music?

By Tatiana Bandurina

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Published: 10Feb2010
Word count: 571
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Unfortunately, there are no official statistics on the number of children who start taking music lessons, either because they or their parents want this, but never complete the training.

Of course, many children have been pressured by their parents or teachers to graduate from music school, but they never touch the instrument again. You may be one of them.

Dear parents, have you ever asked your young musicians to demonstrate their musical achievements in front of your guests? I am one hundred percent sure that it has happened at least once. Now we shall ask the parents whose children still (or already) do not take music lessons, another question: Have you ever been lucky enough to hear a little musician practicing a new piece during your visit to relatives or friends? I think you have.

Let's see how perceptive you are. How well do you remember the child's reaction to his parents' request to play something for the guests? Did he glow with pride and rush to the instrument? In that case, we congratulate the music teacher and especially the parents: you did your job perfectly well!

But what if the child's reaction was negative?

Having worked with children and adults for many years, I often noticed that parents had to force, or, at least, persuade children to do their music homework. The parents tended to blame everything on a child's laziness. Let's see if there is actually any sense to that statement.

Without even reading the books on education about age-specific features of children, it is clear that small children are hardly ever lazy, and it is also a fact. More often, parents get tired of their hyperactivity, so we will disregard "laziness" as a possible reason and concentrate on what is hidden behind this word.

Usually, at first, children will play a musical instrument with pleasure. But as time passes, problems during the lessons and at home begin. While studying the reasons behind the loss of interest in music among children, I heard and wrote down many different opinions. As a rule, they all stated, "My child was so driven, well-behaved, simply remarkable! As soon as he heard music he was dancing and singing. And when we had company, he himself asked us to listen to what he had recently learned to play. Now he has completely changed!"

Complaining that their children became simply intolerable, parents accused everyone, including their children's new friends, music teacher, etc.

Actually, very few people understand that most of the problems regarding a child's unwillingness to study are provoked by their parents. And those problems can be caused by the different reasons. Some children lose interest in music by the end of the first year of training, and others, in three or five years, and sometimes during the teen years. Please, dear parents, pay close attention to the fact that if the child does not want to study from the very beginning, the reason, as a rule, is his psychological unreadiness for training. So let's pose a question: Who, in your opinion, is responsible for it? You, the parents, of course!

No one likes to make mistakes. Yes, it is great to learn from our own mistakes, but it can be painful. So if there is an opportunity to learn from the mistakes of others - use it! The most important thing is a desire to learn.

Tatiana Bandurina is an educator, an inventor and an author of the book Voices of our children. Tatiana is now a chief of Quintecco Educational Products, Inc., the website is http://www.quintecco.com. She develops new trend in education - Music Education for Parents.

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