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What's Really in Your Control?

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Published: 16Dec2009
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As pickup artists, we tend to think that we can have every women in the world, if we can get "good" enough skills.

Unfortunately, that's just not how it works.

You see, some things are beyond your control.

Women are just as complex and dynamic as you are. And probably less predictable.

I have dated so many women that at first seemed very flakey. I took it personally.

I remember getting MAD when women wouldn't return my phone calls. I thought that they were rejecting me, that they thought they were better than me.

It was even worse when I'd have great interactions, only to be stood up and not called back.

It made no sense!

We got along, so why won't she call me back???

Well, it turns out, the universe doesn't revolve around me.

Now I'm not saying that if you get flaked on, you should just chalk it up to fate and leave it at that.

Always strive to improve and get better results. Use every resource at your disposal - be a student of life, because there's always more information out there to help you.

Along with Julian Fox, my friend and master pickup artist have an extensive tools and strategies for minimizing flaking in dating life.

He knows how to get the woman's number, what to say on texts and phone calls, and even how to set up dates so she'll be sure to show up.

There's principle that I know. I breakdown ENTIRE conversations, step by step with detailed analysis so you know WHY I did what I did.

One thing we talk about is the fact that women have crazy lives. They have all kinds of stuff going on that you don't know about.

She has to manage her dating life (because she's likely already seeing other guys), and she has to manage her family life and friendships, not to mention work, errands, and any catastrophe that may pop up).

Women often play a high-wire balancing act with their social lives. They have to keep track of which social circles to merge and which to keep separate.

They have to keep track of who is fighting with whom, and who gets along with whom.

They have to avoid the ex, and spend time with the friend they had to ditch last week because of working extra hours at work.

Men's lives are much simpler, and this is why it can be hard to understand her not calling you back.

You think, "all she has to do is pick up the phone when I call. She must have some spare time in the evening. She must be consciously CHOOSING to ignore me, therefore she's a bitch and I am upset."

This is not reality.

The reality is that she may simply not have the time or the emotional wherewithal to deal with a new guy right now.

So don't take it personality.

At the same time, you must persist.

Don't give up. I recall pursuing a woman for months - not stalking her mind you - just calling every so often to keep myself on her mind.

And then when the circus in her life blew over, she called me back and we started dating. No big deal.

But if I had flipped out and sent her some angry text message (which I've done - I'm grimacing as I write this), she would have thought I was psycho.

"Oh my god, this guy is crying because I didn't call him back. Does he think he's the center of the universe? What a weirdo. I definitely won't be calling him back."

Don't be that guy.

It's not hard to look better than other guys - most guys are needy, insecure, hot-headed hornballs that have absolutely no idea how to take control of their dating lives.

This is because they are not in control of their own emotions.

Be different - don't take things personal. Always assume attraction.

It's better to just assume she's busy, and persist without getting needy or putting pressure on her.

Get any girl's phone number: meet girls And turn the type of woman your friends go green with envy over, into your loyal girlfriend: Pickup Artist

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