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Why Your Video Game Obsession Can Be A Good Thing

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Published: 21Aug2009
Word count: 804
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Hey man,

As you probably know, I'm a big video-game nerd. My favorites are first-person shooters.

There have been plenty of nights where I forgot to call girlfriends back because I was absorbed in a game of Halo or Call of Duty.

There's this new game out called Dead Space that looks friggin awesome. Hopefully I'll get some time away from work to check it out.

Most guys are into video games. There's something about the goal-achievement structure, and the high level of focus required.

I know that if I'm playing a great game, I can lose myself for hours trying to move on to higher and higher levels.

Plus there's the obvious aspect of aggression. You can shoot people, blow things up, and wreak havoc on entire landscapes without anyone calling the cops (unless you go on a cursing rampage at the top of your lungs when the enemy kills you).

Now if you're thinking, wow this guy has passed up mating just to play a video game, let me explain.

I'm at a point in my life where being in bed with women is no longer some high achievement. It's not some rare treat that I will sacrifice things to get.

In fact, I turn down sleeping with women.

But that doesn't mean I don't have a lot of mating with women. It's just that if I took every opportunity to get with a woman, I wouldn't have time to eat or sleep.

Hey boss, I'm a little late on the deadline this girl kept me up all night, and I forgot I had this other chick coming over this afternoon. I'll need an extra day to get everything done?

But he's a younger guy, and I can't blame him. I like to see my trainers living the kind of lifestyle they enjoy it's one of the well-deserved perks of this job.

It's one of those quality problems a lot of guys don't anticipate and can have difficulty adjusting to.

So where was I?

How can playing video games help you with women?

Well typically it's considered counter-productive to sit at home and play video games rather than getting out and being social.

And I agree.

I'm coming at this from a different angle.

I want you think about the mindset you have when you play a video game, a first-person shooter especially.

First of all, you know your objective, and you are focused completely on that goal.

Second, you have a handful of tools at your disposal. Not too many, as that would be overwhelming.

But just enough to handle whatever comes your way.

Third, you are constantly progressing to the next level. And when you get there, you face a whole new set of challenges to which you have to adapt.

And adapt you do, gradually.

But once you have that new skill-set, it's yours. You won't make the same mistakes you did before.

You are operating on a higher level.

I never use cheats. I like the process of learning. I've learned to ENJOY LEARNING.

If all the work is done for you, where's the fun in that?

Getting good with women is THE EXACT SAME in respect to the above three aspects of playing video games.

Now everyone deals with failure in their own way.

Some guys reframe it as a learning opportunity.

Other guys brush it off and don't care.

And some guys get mad.

I'm not gonna lie. I've thrown my Xbox controller at the TV many times.

But I'm usually very cool. If I die, I relax, take a break, and reflect on what happened.

Then I return to the game and do a little better.

If you've faced a lot of failure with women, it's easy to snap and either lose your temper or give up.

Heck, I don't blame you. I've definitely had some low moments - much more than any self-respecting guy would put himself through.

But in my younger days, I was a glutton for pain, because it meant experience.

Thing is, I'm exceptional in my drive to learn. I always have been.

And I think you are too, otherwise you wouldn't be reading this.

What irks me is that intelligent, successful, GOOD guys are often the ones that FAIL WITH WOMEN.

It's just not fair.

That's why I do what I do.

It's so satisfying to me to watch a guy who DESERVES to have great women in his life go from awkward and insecure, to confident and POWERFUL.

They are meant to CHANGE THE WAY YOU THINK.

They are meant to gradually and efficiently cultivate all the mental tools you'll need for your interactions with women.

The whole point is to internalize these tools, to BECOME the kind of guy that naturally and effortlessly attracts and escalates with women.

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