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I Have This Need To Talk About Death

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Published: 05Mar2009
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What does it all mean? Life is this great mystery often producing periods of great joy, great hurt, great sadness, and is always accompanied by trials and tribulations of one sort or another. We are put on this earth for one reason or another, for a period of time, all the while searching for what we are to accomplish. Why are we here? What are we to do? What should be our goals? Why do some live long lives, while others are here for a brief period? The questions are many, and the answers are difficult to come by. The complexity of life is amazing and not easily understood. I think that it is important for humans to realize that we are imperfect beings, and that we often face difficult circumstances. We could all be scholars in every discipline known to mankind, and yet fall short of the expertise we need when facing a particular day of reckoning in our lives.

Faith is a wonderful thing. I have come to cherish it more and more each day of my life. In this most recent week, I became aware of three deaths. These deaths ended the earthly lives of three people that I did not know very well. One involved the ending of the life of an 88 year-old father of a boyhood friend, the other of a 61 year old mother in-law and grandmother to more recent friends, and finally, the life of a 25 year old nephew of my beloved brother and sister in-law. The pain and sadness in the voices and eyes of those who did know these three people was quite evident. There is no doubt in my mind that these three people were not only loved and cared for, but I am certain that they left meaningful and eternal impressions on many lives.

Those who were intimately involved with each of these three people might find what I am about to mention, hard to believe. Despite the different circumstances causing their respective deaths, I submit for discussion that they were similar in one important aspect. The three of them passed a way suddenly, and without pain and suffering. Why is this important? I think that it has significant meaning for the following reasons. In the Book of Genesis of the Holy Bible, we are told of the prophet Enoch. Enoch was so pure of spirit that he did not have to experience death and was simply taken into Heaven to be with his Creator. If my memory serves me correctly, Enoch was the last of the Prophets to walk with God. In modern times, though we do not have the honor of walking with our God, is it not possible for certain humans to pass to meet their Maker without experiencing death? I often think of those who die suddenly. For those who pass away, I can't think of a more Graceful way to enter everlasting life. For those of us left behind, we might have wanted to "set the record straight" or have had one more opportunity to say "I love you". I am of the belief that those we truly hold dear in our lives, regardless of the circumstances, have love binding ties that don't require any spoken word or the need for apologies. I am reminded of the tsunami that hit a few years ago in Thailand killing so many people. Many of these people were children and a great number of those killed died instantly. How do we make sense of this tragedy? Well, imagine scores of young children, moments before the tsunami hit, playing on the beach and searching for seashells. Experiencing death must have been the furthermost thought from their minds. Then, suddenly, they were with their Maker. If I could choose my passing, I would choose this way. My true loved-ones can take comfort in the fact that I will always love them, regardless of the events transpiring at the time. Sometimes, our most heated, and seemingly hateful arguments, are the truest indications of our feelings for another. For me, the only person that can raise such a passionate feeling in me is one I love with all of my heart. For the families and friends of those just passing away, fear not. I am certain that they loved you all very much and knew that they were loved. You can take solace in the fact that your loved ones went to be with their Maker in much the same way that Enoch went to be with his. What a pleasant thought during a time of great mourning.

Guilt is a feeling that rears its head, often at the time of one's passing. Guilt is further magnified when we humans believe that we should be responsible for knowing all of the answers to the questions of life. Mistakes are part of life and one of its greatest mysteries. As parents, we are charged with the responsibility of raising a child that is imperfect, living in an imperfect world, when we ourselves are imperfect. This is an uphill battle for sure. In fact, all relationships are difficult to some degree. Those who make mistakes and then try to overcome them because of the love they have for others are the greatest heroes of all. They never give up and always have hope for another day. I have Faith that we should not be overcome by our guilt as we are forgiven through the power of Redemption. Redemption is the underlying theme of The Holy Bible and likely the cornerstone of all religions talking of a loving and merciful God.

My Faith tells me that death is not a punishment, either to those left behind or to the person who has passed. It is the means by which we get to pass through the Vail and claim our everlasting life. Psalm 23 makes reference to the "Valley of Death" as it discusses passing to be with our Lord for all eternity. I am not sure why some get to live long lives, why some die peacefully, and why some must die horrible deaths. What I do believe is that there is a reason. Maybe death from a prolonged illness (a long walk through the "Valley Death") is meant to teach Faith to those close to the departed. Maybe someone who dies suddenly (a person who might be faithful enough to skip over a walk through the "Valley of Death") has accomplished the goals that our Heavenly Father has established. I don't know the reason why death takes on many faces. My guess is that I am not supposed to know. What I can tell you is this; there is a family that once had a loving father who sacrificed to make sure that his family had all that it needed to survive financially and spiritually. He taught his family a great lesson that lives on today. There is a family that once had a loving mother in-law and grandmother who put the needs of others ahead of her own. She selflessly worked to help people in nursing homes and would do anything to help a friend or family member. Upon passing, she has donated her organs so that others will have the opportunity to make more of their lives. This lesson in service to others is truly God-like. And finally, there is a family that once had a young son, brother, nephew, and father who had a Great Spirit about himself that was infectious to all who were around him. His 14 year old sister spoke at his funeral and was poised as she smiled lightly regarding the comments she had made about her brother. At this time of great sadness, there was laughter as she remarked about the times she had with him. I had this vision of their relationship and it was one of great love and respect. She had nothing prepared and spoke from the heart. She was sad but somehow happy at the same time. It was as though she knew she would see her brother again some day and their relationship would last forever. This lesson in Faith and spirituality was clearly passed on to her form her brother who she loved and continues to love.

I learned from the passing of these three people that life is not about punishment for the mistakes we make in life; it is instead about the Redemption. We're not perfect, but we can come back from our mistakes. We should always strive to be as our Father in Heaven, but He knows and understands that we will fall short. Our efforts should continue to the very end of our earthly lives.

In loving memory to the dearly departed and with love to their friends and families.

William (Ron) Piner, CPA Host of "Better Business" Saturday mornings at 10ET On WBIS AM 1190 http://www.wbis1190.com taxguy9@hotmail.com

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