Food In Appleton: The Epic Burrito Quest

We were on the outskirts of Appleton. My heroic adventuring party and I had accepted the quest to go find the Epic Burrito after we had saved the town from the Guacamole Raiders. We had geared up after a good night's rest, Appleton sure knows how to party, I'll let you know. Anyway, we trudged along in the early morning light. The air was crisp and refreshing and was great weather for traveling.

It wasn't long before we encountered Sangrias and Margaritas on the road. They were traveling merchants in the area and knew the latest rumors a group of adventurers could benefit from. After some small talk and sharing of rumors, we went on our way. Supposedly the Epic Burrito was to the North, so North we went. Hunger set in not long after and we started to think we should find a place to eat. We all were craving fusion cuisine and searched for a place that served such a meal. We would have eaten on the go, but we had not the required ingredients to properly make a meal in our packs. As luck would have it, we spotted a small building nestled in the woods with a sign that simply said "food." We hoped that they served culinary fusion in any capacity. We were pleasantly surprised to find that they did indeed serve what we craved.

We were seated by a member of the staff and offered water. We declined the water but rather ordered a pitcher of sangria, as it was still early in the day after all. As we sipped our drinks, one of my group members pointed out that there was a menu item named "Epic Burrito." We thought it a strange coincidence that they served exactly what we quested for. We demanded that we be given the Epic Burrito or at the very least, its location. We were declined and told that it would cost us.

We sorted our money and counted it. We had enough to order exactly one of the burritos. We didn't know if this is what the Governor of Appleton had wanted and thought it would be a shame if we were to order it and be out the coin. After some terse discussion, we came to an agreement as a party and made the order. We waited and waited. Then our order came out encased in something called a "to go box." We paid and left in high hopes of success.

We traveled back to the Governor's manor hefting the Epic Burrito in our packs. It was heavy enough that we had to take turns. We were led through the foyer and to the Governor's study. We presented him with the Epic Burrito hesitantly just in case we had erred. The Governor was ecstatic when we pulled the burrito from our pack. He thanked us hurriedly and sat down to eat. We were ushered out without reward. The dude had just wanted lunch on someone else's coin. Boo!

Tim Hiller is a freelance writer that sometimes wonders if that fusion cuisine went bad and maybe that would explain the weirdness...

This article was published on 05 Feb 2016 and has been viewed 1046 times
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