I felt my brother who had autism, was being the center of attack from family, friends, relatives, who were giving unwanted advice to my parents. Many mistakes were made talking to my parents about advice that was not necessary. They did not need the kind of advice they were receiving.
If you are a parent(s) of an autistic child, it might be wise to be aware and take into consideration what relatives, friends, family and others, are telling you what to do with your child. For example:
* One of the many interesting things I have experienced, is many people believe because your child is autistic he or she, does not comprehend what is going on around them. Many autistic children do not speak or have a vocabulary to speak many words, but they do understand what is going on around them.
This does not mean they have deaf ears. Autistic people may not respond to the way you as parent(s), caregiver(s), would like them to, but they respond in other ways. In addition, many autistic individuals have acute hearing. This is one of the mistakes people should never say to parent(s), caregiver(s) who have an autistic child.
* How do you feel about the mistakes other people have made, by telling you how you are to discipline your autistic child? I was angry when friends, relatives, and other individuals were so powerful to give advice, as to how to discipline my brother.
There were many times when it hurt me. My bother did not respond to routine discipline, and I have seen this response in other autistic children. That was a huge mistake people made by talking to my parents and not understanding what it is like to be a parent and discipline a child with autism.
* There are times you would like your child to be part of activities that involve your family and other families. Everyone is invited, except your child who is autistic. He or she, will not be able to attend some of the fun activities because he or she, does not know how to behave properly.
You are informed by the other parent(s), to leave your son or daughter behind and make other arrangements for your child who has the disorder of autism, but the rest of the family is welcome.
I would suggest that you attend family gatherings with the whole family present. Your child who has autism, is part of your family. He or she should be accepted. If not, perhaps it might be wise to attend a gathering where your child is accepted with the whole family present.
* Many people believe they are helping other parent(s), caregiver(s), by giving unwanted advice to the parent(s), who have a child with autism. This is a mistake and it can be extremely hurtful to the people receiving these messages.
* Children who have special needs are valuable and important people. The parent(s), caregiver(s), of these children are struggling and are doing the best they know how and understand, given the many levels of autism.
* Do not make these mistakes and many others, by talking to parent(s) who have autistic children, giving unwanted advice or opinions.
Are you willing to know when not to give unwanted advice to the people who have a child with autism? Will you be willing to correct these mistakes by doing research about the disorder of autism and try to put yourself in the position they are in and help them?
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